Death Is Scary
by alterego ero-mandy
Summary: Nyota Uhura's found drinking herself to death by her Captain after her parents have been killed in a terrible fire and she requests her Captain James T. Kirk's company on shore leave. Will he be able to save her? Or will Starfleet lose one of their most talented Lieutenant's? Set after STID, Spock and Nyota have broken up. Obvious Kirk/Uhura. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I honestly don't know why I'm making this fanfic. Well here's a crazy reason, I wanted to portray Uhura in a vulnerable light and let her favorite Captain comfort her. So here's a long drawn out story involving our fierce Lieutenant and daring Captain. **_**NOT FOR FANS OF UHURA/SPOCK, **_**I repeat, **_**NOT FOR FANS OF UHURA/SPOCK! **_**There will be absolutely none of that in this fanfic. I hope you enjoy the first taste enough to R&R, favorite and follow. **

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**Chapter 1: Death Is Scary**

Strange and confused looks were thrown Lieutenant Uhura's way, but her foggy vision prevented her from noticing them. It could only be described as strange and out of character to see the usually controlled Lieutenant drinking herself to death. No one of the crew could bring themselves to actually sit down and ask her what was wrong; no one except the Captain himself, James T. Kirk.

Kirk froze at the sight of his best Lieutenant slouched at the bar, resting her cheek against a bottle of whiskey. So many things were wrong with this image that his mind almost completely rejected it. However, Jim straightened his posture and put on his most calm expression as he strode over to sit next to Uhura.

"Lieutenant, what exactly are you doing?" Nyota snorts at that, forgetting the glass entirely and taking a sip from the bottle. "I would think anyone as familiar with bars as you would know. I'm drinking myself to _death."_

Jim takes a steadying breath, "Why?" Nyota finally lifts her head from the bar to look at him. Jim swallows at her tear soaked face. The Captain looks around the room, silently ordering everyone to pay them no mind. He stands and grabs Uhura's arm, pulling her from her seat. "Come on, I'll take you to your quarters."

"No…I don't want to go there."

"Well I have to talk to you somewhere. It's either your quarters, mine, or we could keep this strictly professional and take it to my ready room. It is your choice, Lieutenant." Nyota suddenly feels ashamed under the scrutiny of those piercing blue eyes.

Nyota willingly lets him escort her to her quarters. Since Nyota cannot remember the passcode to save her life, Jim just punches in the override. He basically carries her to the bed, laying her down gently.

"Now do you wanna tell me what _that _was all about?" Nyota feels tears roll down her cheeks again at the mere thought of the undeniable. She pulls her legs up to her chest and wishes she could disappear.

"My parents died." Three words chill James to the core and he freezes a second time, wondering what it is he's supposed to say, do. What should anyone do in this situation? His instincts kick in and without really thinking about it he crouches down to wrap his arms around the sobbing and weak girl.

He feels her tense in his arms and he moves to leave her, prepared to apologize profusely. Jim gasps when he's suddenly hugged back, hard. Nyota turns to rest her head in his neck. Jim feels tears soak his skin and he begins to rub her back.

"I'm so sorry… How did it happen?"

"Fire…I won't even get to see their faces again. They're charred."

Choking sobs fill the air, Nyota tightening the grasp on her Captain. If she let's go…she's gone.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine, Captain, thank you for caring enough to ask." James pulls away to flash that charismatic smile, blue eyes twinkling like moonlight on the ocean.

"Call me Jim." Those three words brighten something inside Nyota for some reason she cannot explain. "Okay…"

"When did you find out?"

"This morning." Nyota curses herself for crying again, holding her face in her hands. Jim scrambles to get some tissues and politely hands them to her.

"Thanks."

"No problem, Uhura. So…you're telling me, that you found out you became an orphan this morning and decided to come in and work your shift as if everything was fine?"

Nyota nods and looks up at him through blurry tears. "If I have to call you Jim, then it is only fair that you call me Nyota."

"Nyota…" Jim tests the word in his mouth and Nyota shrugs. "It means star in my native tongue. You'll get use to it." Jim smiles at her before sitting next to her on the bed.

"Do you think you'll be ok for tonight? Would you like me to stay longer and talk or I could leave right now."

Nyota sniffles and looks up at the man, surprised and pleased with how kind he is being.

"I know you should leave but I feel like…like I can't live without them. They've been here with me through everything and now that they are not… I wanna die." She closes her eyes and lets a fresh wave of tears escape, hearing Jim suck in a breath.

They look at each other in the quiet and secure dimness of the room and Jim shakes his head. "No, death…death is scary, Lieutenant."

"What do you mean?"

"Well…your ex-boyfriend told me 'you can't cheat death', I say that's a load shit." Nyota laughs, eyes widening in surprise that she still remembers how to. Jim smiles at her, no teeth, but still a smile.

"I know about death okay? I was dead for weeks. And let me just tell you, it's not fun."

"What's death like?"

"I couldn't bring myself to tell you, or anyone. It's a question that should never be answered. I wish it had stayed that way with me. Please tell me you don't really want to die. I know you couldn't give all of this up – Starfleet, the Enterprise, seeing _my _gorgeous face every day."

Nyota surprises herself with another laugh, making Jim smile, his blue eyes crinkling at the sides.

"I like it when you laugh. I'm glad you haven't forgotten."

"I thought I did…um…Jim?" Her Captain looks at her expectedly, those blue eyes wide open. "Could you stay with me tonight?"

"You don't think you'll make it on your own?" Nyota shakes her head slowly and Jim feels a stab of hurt in his heart from seeing his usually strong Lieutenant looking up at him so vulnerable and frightened.

"I'll stay with you tonight…and any other time you need me."

"Thank you…Jim, thank you."

"It's about 1100, I think you should get some sleep."

"You should too."

Jim smiles at her, tucking her in carefully after she is settled under the blankets. Minutes go by with Jim perched on the edge of the bed and watching his Lieutenant try to go to sleep. Jim furrows his brow in worry as she continues shaking and not from cold.

Finally Jim sighs and builds up enough courage to climb under the covers and wrap his arms around his Lieutenant. Nyota gasps and stiffens in his embrace. Jim shocks them both with his calm and collected voice whispering, "relax…I got you. Just get some sleep."

"Okay…you'll still be here in the morning?" Nyota's voice mimics a small frightened child.

Jim nods, tightening his arms around her small waist and whispering into her hair. "Of course I will."

"Thank you…" Nyota's voice trails off as she finally surrenders to her fatigue, falling asleep in her Captain's cocoon.

For the longest time it so seems, Jim just lays still and watches her sleep, hearing her calm deep breaths and hoping that her sleep is peaceful and undisturbed.

The following morning Jim wakes up before Nyota, taking the time to stay rooted in his place and watching her. He tries to convince himself that he's only staying because she would notice his absence. Jim refuses to acknowledge the fact that he likes holding her smaller frame in his arms, feeling her against him.

Somewhere during the night Nyota rolled over to face him, placing her fists on his chest and snuggling into neck. Jim sighed at feeling her chest expand against his.

Finally Nyota wakes and drags sleepy eyes up to look at him. "Good morning."

"Morning, sleep well?"

"Yeah, thank you again."

"Stop thanking me already. I'm just glad you're okay." Nyota nods and smiles, standing up to go brush her teeth. Jim speaks over the running water.

"I think you should stay in your quarters today. Or just don't work your shifts." Nyota pops her head out the door.

"Why would I do that?"

"Because…you're not in the best state of mind. You did say you wanted to die."

"If anything, I need to work to take my mind _off _of it."

"I'm not sure about that, Lieutenant. I don't want to use my superior rank against you." Nyota walks over to stand in front of him. "Then _don't_."

"Do you really think you can work efficiently on the bridge?"

"Yes." Jim stands up and clears the distance between them, leaving mere inches between them. "You're holding it in. Just cry like you did last night. I didn't get over my brother's death by working. And I can guarantee you the same thing."

Jim sees something shatter in her resolve and she bites her lip, eyes growing glossy as they flutter around the room and then back at him. "Come here." Nyota breaks into sobs and throws herself into his arms, glad that he's holding onto her so tightly.

Jim shushes her, hand absently stroking her hair as she takes two fists full of his uniform. "It's okay, you're okay."

"I don't think so."

"Yeah you are…you are, trust me. If you weren't acting this way then you wouldn't be human."

"Okay…" Jim continues to rub her back soothingly, his other hand holding her warm neck. "Will you stay here and rest then?" Nyota nods and pulls away to look at him, smiling softly. "Yeah, thanks again…for everything."

Jim stiffens nervously when she leans forward on her tippy toes to plant a soft kiss on his cheek. They both feel a shot of warmth from where her lips made contact with his skin. Nyota pulls away slowly, looking up at him in question.

They grow alarmingly aware of how close they are. Before Jim can object are think otherwise, Nyota is taking his lips with her in a curious and slow taste. A nagging voice tells him this isn't right, that he shouldn't be taking advantage of her when she's so fragile.

But it feels so good he cannot stop. The Captain cannot even remember the last woman he kissed liked this…well he never kissed a woman so gently, so soft, as if he was afraid they might break.

Jim allows Nyota to lead the kiss, but he soon dominates it. He places his hands on her waist and pulls her snug against him. They stumble to the bed, Jim sitting down and moaning softly when she straddles him.

Her lips are soft and taste of honey as they press desperately against her Captain's. Jim starts at the eager tongue invading his mouth but doesn't skip a beat before gently sucking on it, adding his own wet muscle to the sweet sensation.

Jim's hands wander lower to her hips, cupping her ass as Nyota entwines her fingers in his blonde hair. James holds her tighter and slams her onto the bed, pinning her body to the bed with his own.

James gasps when Nyota bucks her hips up towards his hardness. The Captain never being known for will power, he cannot resist fisting her silky hair and grinding against her greedily.

But the voice in the back of his head wins out and he breaks the kiss abruptly, rolling off of her and staring up at the ceiling. "We shouldn't have done that." He pants breathlessly.

"But we did."

"It can't happen again. I shouldn't have taken advantage of you when you're like this."

"_I _kissed _you_; you didn't take advantage of me. I wanted to kiss you." Jim sits up and looks at her, confused and stunned. "Why?"

Nyota sits up also, "I don't know. You were being so nice and…I don't know."

"I have to get out of here. I'll check on you later, okay?" Jim stands and quickly walks to the door, ignoring Nyota's calls after him.

"Jim, wait, I-I'm sorry!"

Her quarter doors slide shut behind him and she thinks about what they just did and what she just said. She realizes terrifyingly that she just completely lied to him. Nyota was not and _is _not sorry for what happened at all. She wanted to…but did he? Did she actually take advantage of her own Captain? She has to apologize immediately! She was completely out of line.

Nyota quickly dresses in a clean uniform, her panic about the situation growing with every passing second she races out of her quarters to find her Captain.

James T. Kirk sighed, baring his teeth against the freezing water running over his heated body. He silently willed his erection to disappear and the cold water slowly helps. He runs shampoo through his hair and soap over his body.

His thoughts drift to his kiss with Nyota. It had been good, the best he's ever had. Never has he ever _wanted _someone so much. But it was wrong, so wrong.

_But it felt good…but I can't kiss members of my crew. They're my family. She's not thinking clearly anyway._

Jim turns off the water and steps out of the shower, drying off his hair and body before finding a clean uniform to wear.

He quickly dresses and walks to the bridge, greeting his crew as if he didn't just have a hot make out session with his own Lieutenant. Jim lounges comfortably in his Captain's chair.

Minutes go by when finally, Nyota arrives on the bridge to everyone's surprise since they've heard the rumors by now. Jim struggles to look her in the eye and _not _thinking about her talented mouth as she stands by his chair.

"Captain, may I speak to you privately?"

"Sure, Lieutenant, Spock, you have the con." I follow her into the vacant hall and cross my arms.  
"Captain, I find I must apologize for what happened this morning. I should not have kissed you. It was incredibly out of line."

Neither Jim or Nyota knows what comes over him before he smashes his lips to hers. Jim fights the urge to throw her small body against the wall, instead taking her face in his large hands and kissing her gently, slowly. Nyota moans into her Captain's mouth, wrapping her hands around his wrists and silently granting his tongue access.

They don't know how long they stay in each other's arms, Nyota humming softly. Jim finally breaks away for air. "I'm sorry." Nyota holds up a finger to shush him. "Don't apologize, I kissed you back. So what are we?"

"I'm not entirely sure, but all you need to know is that I'm here for you as you go through this. Okay?" Nyota nods and smiles, clearing the distance between them in seconds and wrapping her Captain in a tight hug.

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THREE DAYS LATER

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Nyota rocked herself on the shower floor. She had been feeling sick for the past two days and hadn't told a soul of her condition.

Every kind of food repulsed her, she could keep nothing down and she was constantly shaking with the thoughts of her now deceased parents. Nyota still hasn't come out of denial. She refuses to believe that they are dead, they can't be.

But every call she made to their home was answered with a mechanical voice, a friendly mechanical voice that haunted her nightmares, mocking her.

The scorching hot water ran over her hair and body, but did no help to warm her. Nyota's heart had turned to ice the day she found out about their death and since then no blood has pumped through her veins. In her head, she was asleep, having a terrible dream and she just needed to wake up.

"_I gotta wake up…please wake up, please…"_ Nyota muttered to herself over and over again.

James T. Kirk thought nothing of his Lieutenant's absence the first two days. He merely thought she had taken his advice and was resting in her quarters. But on the third day Kirk had an uneasy feeling that something was wrong when _no one_ had seen or heard from Nyota _at all._

Before James could realize what he was doing, his feet were plotting a course for his Lieutenant's quarters.

When he stood face to face with her white door he takes a deep breath and steadies himself before knocking three times. Jim presses his ear to the door and hears running water but no reply. He knocks again and calls, "Nyota. Nyota let me in please. Nyota!"

Jim shakes his head, he really didn't want to do this but she was giving him no choice. He punches in the override code and the doors swish open.

Jim runs to the bathroom, gasping at the sight of his Lieutenant naked and curled into a ball on the shower floor. Jim rushes over and turns off the water, kneeling next to Nyota and holding her shoulders, uncaring of her being nude.

"Nyota, what, what are you doing? No one has seen you in days. How are you feeling?" Nyota doesn't answer him only continues to mutter _"gotta wake up…please wake up, please…"_

James shakes his head and gently places an arm under her knees and one behind her wet back. He lifts her shaking naked body in his arms, carefully cradling her to his clothed warm chest. Nyota's drenched hair looks black as it drips onto Jim's golden uniform. "Please stop muttering that. What does it even mean?"

Nyota's brown eyes look dull as they slowly focus on his cerulean orbs. "James…what are you doing?"

"Taking you to Medical Bay."

"Why?"

"Because you're not well; it seems like you're a second away from a mental breakdown."

James sits Nyota down on her bed, grabbing a towel and patting her dry before gingerly wrapping her in a silk robe. Jim lifts her again, quickly carrying her to Medical Bay bridal style. "What the hell is this, Jim?"

"It's Nyota, she is sick, really sick and…I don't know what to do." Bones shakes his head, motioning to a biobed.

Jim lays his Lieutenant down carefully, afraid of breaking her. Somewhere during the walk Nyota had passed out in his arms, drooling slightly on his shoulder.

"So what happened?"

"I don't know. I found her in the shower muttering something about waking up. I think she had a mental breakdown."

"Well her weight is lower than it should be, she's colder and her rate is slower. Some sleep and she'll be fine. I highly recommend she has some shore leave to take care of her parent's funeral and get over their death."

"I know; she cannot remain on the Enterprise. As soon as she wakes she will be sent back to earth for immediate shore leave. Do you really think she will be okay, Bones?"

Leonard McCoy gives his friend a sympathetic look and nods while scribbling something on his PADD. "Of course she will, Jim, Uhura isn't going out that easy. And since when did she let you call her Nyota?"

"A few days ago, it's kind of a long story I'm not willing to go into."

"Okay, well I have paperwork needing my signature. You gonna stay here?" Jim nods and makes himself comfortable in a chair next to the biobed.

Hours later James still sits next to his Lieutenant, holding her warm hand in his. James finds a bearable position to sleep in and whispers a goodnight to Nyota.

The next morning Jim gets breakfast and comes back to Nyota's room, the Medical Bay growing use to his constant presence. Jim reads romance novels to her, hearing that Nicholas Sparks was her favorite.

_The Notebook_ was the first book he started with her. After each day Jim would tell her how beautiful she looked, how he hoped she would get better soon, and how much he missed talking to her, seeing her glare or roll her eyes whenever he was being ridiculous. Then in a bid goodnight he would brush a lock of hair behind her ear and kiss her lips and forehead.

As Nyota got better the attention slowly shifted from her to the Captain. He was not getting enough sleep and Bones desperately urged to leave Nyota's side for his own comfortable bed in his own quarters; reminding him that _he _wasn't the one checked into Medical Bay.

After a week Jim finally took his friend's advice and went back for his shift on the bridge. The Captain was making his way to the bridge when Bones stopped him.

"Jim, Jim stop! I'm tryin' to talk to you, you bastard!" Jim laughed lightly at his friend's usual stubborn country drawl.

"What?"

"It's Uhura; she woke up after you kissed her."

"Good! That's good, right? Is there something else?"

"Yeah… I told her that she was placed on immediate shore leave and, well…she requested that you accompany her."

James stifled a shocked gasp and raises his eyebrows in question. _"What?"_

"I'm not buttering your biscuits here, she asked that you accompany her."

"But _why_, did she ask for _me _of _all people_, to join her?"

"I don't know, she wouldn't say. You have to talk to her yourself to find out."

"Fine, I will." Jim marches past his CMO towards Medical Bay, reaching Nyota's room. She's propped up against some pillows, reading _The Notebook_ when she looks up at him and smiles warmly.

Jim forgets about what he came to talk about and smiles at her, rushing over to give her a tight hug. "Hey, I missed that smile."

Nyota laughs and holds up the book. "Did you read this to me while I was in a coma? Leonard and Christine said you did. They thought it was so adorable and sweet of you to do that."

Jim turns sheepish and rubs the back of his head, a blush creeping into his cheeks. "Yeah…I heard Nicholas Sparks was your favorite."

"Yeah, you heard right."

"So how are you feeling?"

"Better. Thanks for being here for me."

"I never left your side."

"_Really?_ Did you sleep in here?"

Jim nods and laughs at how stupid it was. He finally remembers why he came here in the first place. "So Bones told me that you requested me on shore leave."

"I did."

"But…_why?"_

"Because no one is able to comfort me like you do. And God knows I need comforting in a time like this. You seem like a strong person to depend on, I just need you to be my rock. Can you do that for me…please?" Jim shakes his head and shrugs.

"You know I can't really say no to you."

"Great."

"So where are we going?"

"My parents lived in Africa."

"_Africa? _We're going to _Africa?"_

Nyota laughs and playfully rolls her eyes. "Yeah, you've been to uncharted planets before and yet _freak out _at going to a continent."

"I'm in, let's do it."

"Thank you." Jim waves a hand with an easy smile. "No problem. I'll do anything to get my friend back." Nyota smiles and opens her arms to him, Kirk easily hugging her tightly.

They pull away and Nyota can't fight the urge to return all the kisses he gave her. She presses her lips to his carefully, testing the waters before he beings to eagerly kiss back. Jim licks her lower lip, asking for access before their tongues collide in a dance. They break apart for air and Jim rests his forehead against hers.

"Yeah, I'm still not really sure about this."

"Will figure it out."

"Oh, I'm sure we will." Nyota giggles at him, kissing him again.

Later on that day Scotty beams both of them down to the coordinates Nyota gave him. When the light fragments disappear Jim sees they're standing on the porch of a large house, a mansion really.

Nyota shrugs at his gaping expression. "My parents were important people. Come on, I'll show you around."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: By the way, the Nyota's ex-boyfriend is Spock. Spock is the only one who said 'you can't cheat death' to James T. Kirk in the first film. I thought it was obvious but I'm sorry for the confusion anyway. Here's chapter two and I think I'm just gonna set up the new place and life for the two of them.**

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**Word Count: 3, 305 **

**Rating: M for sexual content**

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**Chapter 2**

James followed Nyota into the house after she easily unlocked the front door. The inside smelt like roses and vanilla. James took his time to deeply inhale the scent before realizing Nyota was speaking.

"This is the front room." Nyota says, gesturing to the room around them. The front room was filled with lavish rugs and furniture. James couldn't help but gape at the large room, uncaring of Nyota's faint laughter at his reaction. "You like it?"

"Like it? No, I love it. Come on, I wanna see more!" Nyota laughs and waves him into the next room which was the even fancier living room.

After that came the winding staircase, dining room, and kitchen. Down the hall was one of the master bathrooms and laundry room. "Wanna go upstairs?" Jim turned his wide eyed stare toward her with a goofy smile on his face. "Are you kidding? Of course I do!" Jim beat her to the stairs, racing up them at a record pace with a giggling Nyota following him.

"Okay well, down this hall is the grand master bathroom, and the bedrooms. There's about fifteen bedrooms by the way, we've never had all of them filled before. And the bedrooms have their own bathrooms in them. I'll show you the rest of the house tomorrow. I only showed you about half."

Jim gaped at her, "half? You only showed me half?"

"Haha, yeah; you're a small town country boy aren't you?" Jim bobbed his head up and down, looking around the bathroom. "Yeah…pretty much. Iowa is all I've ever known." Jim runs down the hall to a bright pink bedroom.

"This, is my room, if you haven't guessed." Nyota answers his unspoken question, leaning against the door frame as he stood in the middle of the room, taking it all in.

"Come on, I'll show you your room, it's right across from mine."

Nyota shows him his room, it's painted a sky blue and Jim gapes at it, walking in and flopping himself onto the matching comforter. "I love it."

"It matches your eyes." Jim waggles his eyebrows seductively and Nyota throws her head back, laughing. Jim suddenly pulls off his regulation boots and waves her over before jumping on the bed like an excited child. "Come on! When's the last time you jumped on a bed, huh?"

Nyota shakes her head before tugging off her black boots and leaping on the bed with her Captain.

She can tell Jim is surprised that she actually joined him, but he doesn't stop bouncing, smiling at her. They laugh joyfully like children and in this moment Nyota forgets that she's in a house that belonged to people no longer here.

Jim looks at his pretty Lieutenant as she laughs and looks down at the bed. Her brown eyes are twinkling, eyes crinkled in a smile, dark ebony hair falling out of her ponytail and bouncing around her shoulders. Kirk laughs before grabbing Nyota's waist and slamming her to the bed, tickling her sides mercilessly.

Nyota laughs even harder, tears springing to her eyes as she curls into a ball away from Jim, trying to get him to stop. "Stop, stop! Jim, I can't breathe!"

"Haha!" Jim finally stops, rolling her over to pin her to the bed with his body. They stare at each other, both of them catching their breath before Nyota leans forward and kisses him hungrily. Jim quickly reacts, holding her waist and pressing their hips together.

They kiss for long, drawn out minutes, both of them breathing through their noses. Jim is determined to only let it go this far, no penetration. Nyota locks her legs around him, pulling her Captain impossibly closer. They kiss for a few more minutes before Jim shakes his head, breaking the kiss and sitting up to look at his pretty Lieutenant.

"I can't do this. We shouldn't be acting sexually together and I cannot bring myself to sleep with a member of my crew."

"So what you're saying is, as long as you are here with me – we will never sleep together?" Jim nods slowly, trying to adjust himself to where his erection doesn't show so much.

"But you want to sleep with me, correct?"

Jim is shocked at her words, his eyes widening slightly but he swallows and nods furiously. "Y-yes, v-very much so."

"Then why won't you?"

"Because you are not in the best state and you are grieving. When you're grieving you make bad decisions you will come to regret later. I've had my fair share of that and I don't want any part of it now." Nyota nods, looking slightly impressed. "You really have matured since the Academy."

"Thanks, so you only showed me half of the house?"

"Oh, that," she waves a hand, "I'll show you tomorrow." Jim pouts and crosses his arms. "But I wanna see the rest of the house." Jim whines and Nyota rolls her eyes before walking out of the room. Jim eagerly follows as she leads the way.

Nyota makes her way to one of her most favored rooms. She smiles when she hears Jim's gasps at the sight. The floor is paneled glass, looking down at one of their many courtyards. Jim goes to his hands and knees, looking down at all the beautiful exotic flowers, bushes, and luscious green grass.

"You like it?" Jim laughs, spreading his fingers on the glass. "How many times do I gotta tell you? I love it!" He turns to look up at her. "Got any other rooms like this?"

"You bet, come on. This room is my favorite out of all of them."

Jim is excited to see which one it is and follows her down the hall. Her Captain gasps again at where they are. The floor is once again paneled glass, this time looking over a large indoor pool, taking up the entire room below. Actually, the whole room is glass. There's a skylight that let's in the moonlight.

Nyota opens it with the controls by the door and lies down on the cold floor. "Lay down with me." Jim shrugs and lies down next to her. "Why are we doing this?"

"The blue water glows around us, that's why. I used to come here every night when I was a little girl. The blue made me feel safe." Nyota tries not to think about how blue Jim's eyes are, how they also make her feel safe. She swallows a gasp as she looks at him to see that his eyes are as blue as the glow around them.

"What time is it?" Jim looks at his wristwatch. "It's nine o'clock. Show me more of the house."

Nyota shows him all of the indoor courtyards, pool, the man cave and other bedrooms. "Hey, what's this room?" Jim stops, jabbing a thumb toward the closed door Nyota passed on the hall. Jim sees the obvious tremble that goes through Nyota as she looks at the mysterious door.

"It's my father's study. He used to spend all his time in there and I just know it smells like him so…we're not going in there. And you're not allowed to go in there either, understand?" Jim nods slowly but firmly.

"I completely understand; I'll do anything you want. This is your home."

"Good…hopefully before we return to the Enterprise I will be able to go inside there without crying."

"I'll help the best I can."

"Thank you, I appreciate it." Nyota yawns and Jim laughs. "Looks like it's getting late; wanna go to bed?"

"Yeah."

"I'll walk you to your room, malady." Nyota laughs and takes his arm as he leads them up the stairs and to her bedroom. Jim lets her climb under the blankets before tucking her in and sitting on the side of the bed. He pats her thigh lightly and smiles.

"Wanna hear a story?"

Nyota laughs and shrugs. "Sure."

"Once upon a time, way, way back. There's a twelve years old boy living in Riverside, Iowa with his awful stepfather. The stepfather tells him to wash his deceased father's car after his older brother, Sam, runs away. The boy washes the car until it sparkles like diamonds and then gets a crazy idea. He shoves the key into the car's ignition and drives it down the dirt road at 100 mph. The stupid cops come up to him, asking him to pull over immediately."

"Does he listen?" Jim shakes his head at Nyota. "Of course not, he pops off the hood and speeds the car into the ravine. Don't worry though, he hops out of the car before it sails over the edge like the most beautiful metallic bird he's ever seen. This is the day the boy finally became himself."

Nyota nods, thinking about the story before she decides the little boy is Jim. "Is that story about you? The day you became a Kirk?" Jim nods and runs a hand through his hair. "Yep, it's one of my favorite stories to tell. It's the first time I have told you."

"Thanks, I like it very much. But," Nyota's words are interrupted by a big yawn as she stretches her arms over her head, "I better be getting to sleep. You should too." Jim smiles, counting that as the second time she's told him to go to bed.

"I'm gonna start calling you mom if you keep telling me to go to sleep." Nyota laughs and brings up a hand to cup his cheek. Jim blushes when he feels her warm, soft lips pressing lightly against his cheek. She pulls away and smiles at him before Jim feels undeniable warmth in his chest and thinks, fuck it.

Jim leans in and shoves his lips to Nyota's hungrily. Nyota quickly tangles her fingers in his blond hair. Kirk presses forward, pinning her a little to the sea of pillows and holding her waist securingly. Neither of them can deny that this doesn't feel amazing every time they indulge in it. "You feel so good." Jim murmurs into her mouth, stroking her tongue soothingly with his.

Nyota runs a hand down to his back, slipping a hand up his warm regulation shirt. "You do too…" Nyota begins to hum and Jim's groin responds eagerly to the sensations it causes. She feels her Captain's arousal through the comforter and gasps, allowing Jim to slide his tongue in even deeper. Jim's tongue strokes hers and the roof of her mouth, gently sucking on her tongue. Nyota gasps in shock when Jim releases her mouth to suck and lick down her jawline and neck.

Jim carefully slides his hands up her dress before taking her mouth again. When Kirk's fingers reach her panties he stops terrifyingly, realizing that he's gone too far. He yanks his hands away and breaks the kiss.

"Um, I'm s-so, I'm so, so sorry. I went too far and you didn't deserve that."

"Ssshh, Jim, it's okay. Until I say it's gone too far, it hasn't. You just caught me off guard a little bit. But, everything's okay, we just need to stop doing that so much or people are gonna think we're dating. You're just here to help me cope with this but…not like that. I'll see you tomorrow, goodnight Jim."

"G'night." Jim smiles sheepishly before walking out of the room and into his own.

Jim grabs a towel from the bathroom and sits on the bed. Kirk pulls down his regulation pants and briefs, also taking off his golden command shirt.

As Jim tentatively takes his shaft into his hands he groans, rolling his head back to rest on the headboard. Warmth radiates off his member and he feels every pulse that goes through it; he's so hard it's painful.

Thoughts and images of Nyota bombard Kirk's mind as he sets a slow pace of stroking. Kirk tries to keep the fact that they work together and that she is his Lieutenant out of his mind as to not feel the guilt those details would bring on. Kirk moans when he speeds up, now quickly pumping his manhood as he speeds towards completion.

Kirk circles the slit of his head before flicking a thumb over it, shooting him off the edge. Jim bites down hard on his bottom lip, drawing blood, so as not to scream or cry out Nyota's name. Jim's seed shoots out in streams, landing on his torso. Jim grabs the towel and cleans himself before folding it neatly and pushing it under the bed. Jim flops back onto bed, exhausted from his orgasm and quickly falls asleep.

Across the hall, Nyota hugs the blankets tight to her chest, trying to deny and ignore the wetness between her legs. She pulls off her uniform and cleans herself before changing into a comfortable silk nightgown.

Nyota climbs back into bed and switches off the lamp, falling asleep as soon as her head hits the pillow.

While she sleeps, sickening thoughts haunt her. A horror takes place behind Nyota's eyes. She sees her father and mother, screaming in pain and agony as fire engulfs them in a house that is not their own. Uhura hears another scream in the distance and knows it is her own though she was not there when the fire occurred. She is completely helpless, all Uhura can do is watch as they burn to death in front of her, turning from the living to the charred.

The scene repeats itself over and over until she just can't take it any longer. Nyota wakes up with a gasp in the middle of the night, looking around her dark room. She drags her blanket out of the room and down the hall.

Nyota makes herself a cup of hot chocolate and walks to her favorite room, letting the blue glow encase her. Uhura closes her eyes and sighs. Her shaking hands pull the blanket tighter around her body against the cold floor.

Nyota's mind strays to thoughts of her Captain and how his night is going; she hopes it is well, at least better than her own. Nyota does not go back to sleep, instead she just cries softly and dances.

Nyota would always dance with her father. If only he was here now. Another warm tear rolls down her cheek as she twirls gracefully on her toe. Uhura bends over, her hands touching the cool glass of the floor and letting a tear drip onto it as she flips back onto her feet; she fails to notice when the doors slide open the Captain.

Kirk woke up shortly after she did. Jim watches her as she gracefully dances underneath the moonlight and stars, blue water shimmering beneath her.

Jim finally gets enough courage to join, walking over and laying one hand over her waist, the other grabbing her hand. They sway together before Jim spins her and pulls her back just as quickly. Nyota smiles at him weakly through her tears before spinning away again.

Jim rubs his hands together, reassuring himself of his strength before Nyota smoothly runs back to him and he lifts her. Nyota's hands plant themselves on his broad shoulders, her ebony hair like curtains around her face as she looks down at him. Kirk spins them around before slowly lowering her back to the ground, his hands bunching up her nightgown a little bit.

"Why are you out here so late?" Nyota shrugs.

"Couldn't sleep." Uhura decides not to tell Jim about the nightmares, he doesn't need to worry. Uhura can handle them by herself, right? "What about you?"

Jim shrugs, "I don't know why I'm up. I usually sleep all through the night after I close my eyes." Nyota sits back down on her blanket and Jim follows. "Is that hot chocolate?" Nyota nods in answer. "Are you going to finish it?"

"No, you can have it." She had only drunk about two sips from it anyway, it was growing cold. Jim reaches out for the white mug and takes a quick sip. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"Well your parents…and all…and tomorrow you have to start planning for the funeral."

"I know. Will you help me?" Nyota's scared he will say no, as if it is not his place. She stares into his light blue eyes and they widen. "Of course, I thought you already knew that. I said I'll help the best I can, so I will."

"Thank you, again… You were so nice to actually come here with me. I mean how many Captain's would actually accept their Lieutenant's request for them on much needed shore leave?"

"Not many I guess." Jim blushes, at being complimented on his Captaincy. He takes another gulp of coffee. "You're a really good Captain, Jim. Better than Spock and dare I even say Pike. You are so human you're like the soul of the ship."

"Oh, stop it, you're gonna make me blush."

"You already are. Do you blush when people compliment you on your Captaincy?" Jim looks around before nodding sheepishly.

"Jim, you are the youngest Captain in Starfleet. Ha, not just that, but you're the Captain of their flagship. That's a major accomplishment for you, for anyone really. I never thought that being on a Starship in the middle of space would be so fun…but you make it fun. You always joke on the bridge, you don't like it being serious, and you make everyone call you Jim instead of Captain. I…love serving under you and I will be eternally loyal."

Jim clears his throat and blinks his tears back, his sight becoming blurry. "Thank you, Nyota." He shuffles forward and wraps his arms around her, kissing her cheek and then pulling back. "Hey, first time we did that with no make out session afterwards.

"Yeah…um, about that…"

"We need to talk don't we?" Nyota nods. "I don't think it's a good idea for us to get involved romantically right now. I need you to be my rock and if you leave me after we return to the Enterprise, I don't know what will happen." Jim takes her hand and Nyota gasps at the unexpected contact. Her brown eyes look up to his orbs of blue.

"I would be a fool to leave you," he shrugs, "if, I ever got the chance to be with you." Nyota smiles and surprises him with a passionate kiss. Uhura has wanted to kiss him ever since he walked in the room and had the courage to dance with her. Spock found such things illogical.

Jim strokes his tongue against Nyota's, carefully and tentatively lifting her small body into his arms and grabbing her blanket.

Kirk carries her back to her room and lays her down. Their lips break part for a few seconds before Nyota fists his undershirt and pulls him down to rest on top of her. Jim teases a smile into the kiss before complying. Jim finally frees himself of Nyota's lips, laughing at her pouting expression before gently kissing her once on the lips and then on the forehead.

"Goodnight…again. I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

"Okay."

"Sweet dreams." And with that Jim walks out of the room and back to his own bedroom. Nyota sighs and curls into a ball on her side. There will be no such things as sweet dreams tonight.

* * *

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I've been splitting each chapter into two because they always end up being like ten or sixteen pages. It's an awesome thing! I love it! I hope you guys are too though because loving something that no one else does is just sad. **

**Word Count: **

**Rating: M (sexual content)**

**Chapter 3**

THE FOLLOWING MORNING

Nyota woke up to the smell of cooking, more specifically, bacon and eggs. After Jim left last night, Uhura had no nightmares and she was very grateful.

Nyota stands up and stretches. She takes a quick shower and brushes her teeth before walking downstairs.

And there's her Captain, smiling at her and cooking in her own kitchen. "Good morning, sunshine. Sleep well?"

"Sure did. Jim…are you cooking?"

"Well flippin' a flapjack isn't called anything else." Kirk returns his attention to the pan, flipping the flapjack again before sliding it onto a plate. He catches Nyota staring at him and looks up, slightly amused. _"What, _you didn't think I could cook?"

Nyota slowly shakes her head no. "Of course not, why would you?" Jim shrugs at that and turns off the stove.

Uhura towel dries her hair but it still remains damp and shiny. "I like your hair."

Nyota laughs, smiling at him. "Thanks. So what all did you make?"

"Uh…bacon, eggs, grits, flapjacks, toast and biscuits. I went all out for my first morning in Africa."

"You wanna go see some of my favorite places today? I don't have to start planning the funeral until tomorrow."

"Yeah sure but," Jim points a finger at her and furrows his brows, "you mean _we_ don't have to start planning the funeral until tomorrow, right?"

"Right. Let's dig in." Jim laughs and gestures to the feast with a smile. The two of them eat together in the dining room. After they finish she realizes just how good of an idea it was to take Jim.

He distracts her from the emptiness of the house. Just then when they were in the dining room she completely forgot about the vacant chairs around them.

Nyota and Jim quickly get dressed and meet in the garage. Jim gapes at the wide variety of cars around them of course he goes right to the red corvette that matched his father's. Kirk runs his hand over the hood and pops it to look at the brilliant engine in perfect condition.

Uhura crosses her arms over her chest and smirks at the scene of Jim being so happy and awed. "You happy?"

"No…ecstatic and jumping for joy; can I _please _drive this? I promise I won't crash it over a ravine."

Nyota laughs at his joke and nods, already walking forward to sit in the passenger side. "Well, come on, big boy, I'll tell you where to go." Jim fist pumps the air before sliding into the driver's seat. Nyota throws him the keys she already picked up from the key room.

"You knew I was gonna pick this one." She nods.

"Of course you would. There wasn't a doubt in my mind. Come on, I know you wanna hear the engine _purr_." A shiver runs down Jim's spine when she actually _purrs_ like a cat. He shoves the key into the ignition and whoops with excitement when the car roars to life, vibrating all around them. He turns to face Nyota who is laughing at his reaction.

Jim takes her face in his hands and kisses her passionately before rolling the lid down and pulling out of the garage.

"Well…where to?"

It takes a few seconds for Nyota to recover from her surprise at the kiss. "Just drive straight and take a left when you come to a dirt road."

"Cool...hey, what kind of music do they play in Africa?" Before Nyota can answer, (though she's not really sure if he wants her to) Jim turns on the radio, letting a very unfamiliar sound burst through the speakers.

Jim makes a face as he listens to it and glances to Nyota who strangely, has her eyes closed and head bowed. "Hey what is this?" Nyota holds up a finger and Jim patiently waits until the end of the song.

Nyota turns it down and shifts to face him. "That, was a highly religious song. It used to be my religion before I moved to the states."

"Why did it sound so weird?"

"It's in Swahili, Jim, it's my native language."

"So you're fluent?" Nyota nods now rolling her head back and letting the wind thrash her hair around.

"Say something."

"Like what?"

Jim shrugs, "I don't know, anything."

Nyota thinks before deciding on her favorite poem. She turns to face Jim's profile as he continued driving.

"Mimi chukua lenu moya na mimi (mimi chukua kitu katika angu moya)

Mimi ni kamwe bila (kokote mimi enda wewe enda, angu mpenzi, na ote ni fanyika kwa tu mimi ni lenu kitendo, angu kipenzi)."

Nyota struggles to remember the words to the poem with the way Jim is looking at her. Jim's piercing blue gaze is trained on her, awe and admiration written on his face.

"Mimi hofu sio kura (kwa wewe ni angu kura, angu tamu) mimi taka sio dunia (kwa zuri wewe ni angu dunia, angu kweli) na wewe ni ote a mwezi ina wakati dhani na ote a jua tuta wakati imba ni wewe

A wewe enda, angu mpenzi, na ote ni fanyika kwa tu mimi ni lenu kitendo, angu kipenzi)

Mimi hofu sio kura (kwa wewe ni angu kura, angu tamu) mimi taka sio dunia (kwa zuri wewe ni angu dunia, angu kweli) na wewe ni ote a mwezi ina wakati dhani na ote a jua tuta wakati imba ni wewe

Hapa ni the siri sio moja anajua

(Hapa ni the chanzo kwa the chanzo na the tumba kwa the tumba na the uwingu kwa the uwingu kwa a mti simu maisha; amba unaota juu kupita roho weza tumaini au ubongo weza banza)

Na huyu ni the staajabu huo ni shikas the nyotas apart

Mimi chuckua enu moya (mimi chukua kitu katika angu moya)."

Nyota failed to notice when they had stopped at the end of the dirt road. They had arrived at her favorite place.

"We're here!"

"Nyota…that was…absolutely beautiful."

The Lieutenant feels herself blush and looks away. "It's not like you didn't just hear it on the radio."

Jim shakes his head when she looks back at him. "No, those people singing the language was…pretty, at best, you made it beautiful."

Nyota stares into the bluest eyes she's ever known, now playing with the hem of her laced sundress. Only Jim could resort Uhura to such nervousness; around any and everyone else the Lieutenant is known for her famous steel nerve and steady hands.

"How?" Nyota's voice is a thin whisper though Jim manages to catch it.

He shakes his head again. "I don't know, maybe it's how the pronunciation of each word makes your lips move or your artistic tongue, the natural gentle sound of your voice."

Jim is relaxed in the driver's seat, eyes locked with Nyota's, his arm bent over the seat. "What are you trying to do?" Nyota's voice is shaking and she fights to keep eye contact with her Captain.

Jim's face grows puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"You already stated that you would not be sleeping with me as long as we are here. And…the things you say…and do, confuse me…a _lot_. Stop playing games and just tell me straight, _what _is going on here?"

Jim shakes his head again. He had no intention of leading her on _or _playing with her emotions, what cruel bastard would do that to someone who was already mourning?

"Nyota, I…I never played games, I mean I'm not playing games with you. I'm not _that _big of a jackass. Do you want anything from me?"

Nyota turns away from him, blushing again and folding her arms over her chest. She stares down at the lace covering her lap.

"I want you to show me how you would love a woman."

Jim takes a deep breath at those words and finds himself also looking down. "I've never loved a woman before."

A burst of courage goes off in Kirk's chest and he hardly hears the words he's speaking. "But if I did," he draws closer to Uhura with every word, "I'd do it like this…" his voice fades away as he tilts her chin up and takes her lips in his.

Nyota enjoys the slow and careful kiss, struggling to contain the beast of speed and raw lust. Every caress and stroke seems perfectly calculated with an equation; every move Jim makes is precise, controlled and highly effective.

Uhura gently places her hand on Jim's warm cheek, his arms wrapping securely around her waist. The two bodies almost blend into one before finally deciding to come up for a proper breath.

"What were you saying in Swahili again?"

"My favorite poem."

"What's that?"

""I Carry Your Heart with Me" by E. E. Cummings.""

Jim kisses her again just for the mere fact she recited that poem to him. They break apart and Nyota laughs. "Man you sure do love romance, don't cha?"

"Yeah…"

"There may be some here. Come on; show me around your favorite place."

"Okay!"

Nyota drags him out of the car and towards the glistening water of the lake. Jim laughs and tries not to stumble over his own feet as they race toward the dock. Once they get there they take off their shoes and sit on the dock, dipping their feet.

Jim looks around them. The sun is high in the sky with no clouds in sight, the lake stretching out really far, the grass surrounding it is just a gorgeous green and the large trees provide the perfect shade. "I can see why this is your favorite." Jim's words crash in his throat when he sees Nyota's eyes close, two tears clearly running down her cheeks.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, what's wrong?" Jim wraps an arm around her and pulls her into his side. Uhura shakes her head, "it's nothing, I just..." she sniffles, "my mom would come here with me all the time…it was her favorite too and."

"And what?"

"I think I want to spread their ashes here."

"Do you wanna hold the entire funeral here?"

"Yeah. Is that a good idea or am I just being stupid?" Jim shakes his head.

"No, not at all, you can never be stupid."

"Jim? _Everyone_ can be stupid…even Spock and he's the _king _of "logic"."

Jim laughs, his eyes looking over the water. "We should start calling him that. Haha, _man_, I can imagine that eyebrow now." Nyota laughs and scoots closer into him.

Hours past with them sitting there on the dock, talking the daylight away. Suddenly Nyota's stomach growls and they laugh.

"I guess I should put some food in ya, come on." Jim helps her up and walks her back to the car. The engine starts up and Jim begins to pull out, "so what's the plan for today?"

"You're gonna act like your mine, okay? Just for today and then if it feels right then…"

"You really get to be mine?" Nyota blushes and nods, tucking a stray hair behind her ear and letting her eyes graze over the horizon. It was now two o'clock in the afternoon.

"Where should we go? I don't really know this place very well." Nyota laughs and points down the road. "Drive into town and I'll show you this great deli, you'll love it."

"Well I love meat, so it sounds great."

Jim tries not to over analyze the action before he reaches out and takes Nyota's hand. They stare at each other, Jim smiling at her slightly shocked face.

"You said the plan was for you to be mine…I'm just following orders." A small smile takes her lips and she gasps when Jim raises the back of her hand to his.

Kirk returns his attention back to the road. "So how am I doing at being your rock?"

Nyota nods, "let's just say I made the right choice in taking you."

"Thank you, but you should know I cry fairly often." Nyota throws her head back and laughs before looking at him again. Jim raises his eyebrows and sucks in a breath.

"It's true…James T. Kirk is a crier. I'm just forewarning you that no one at that funeral will be crying harder than me."

"Oh yeah cuz I bet the daughter of the actually deceased people is a cold hearted _wrench_." Jim laughs and turns into town.

"Ok, that's the deli place." Nyota points to a quaint store farther down on the city strip. Jim parks the car and they sit down for lunch.

"Ever come to this place with your parents?" Something inside Kirk reassures him that he can ask that question now, as if everything's normal.

Nyota nods as she looks over the menu (which isn't really necessary considering she has a regular she knows by heart).

"Uh-huh, they would take me here every time I got the Principle's List back in middle school. After they found out there was never time I _didn't _get Principle's List, they stopped doing it." Jim laughs, already knowing how smart Nyota is.

"Of course you did. I can't imagine you getting anything below a ninety-six." Nyota glances up at him, still studying the menu, "like you weren't smart when you were a kid. You can't just _suddenly_ have a genius level IQ."

The two finally look at each other. "No… I went through a rebel period that lasted a good few years before someone actually found out I knew what the teacher was droning on about _and_ the mistakes he was making."

"Like _Good Will Hunting._"

Jim gives her bizarre look, more puzzled than anything. Nyota rolls her eyes and drops the menu. "Please don't tell me you have no idea what that movie is, it's a classic and I thought you were a movie guy."

Jim shrugs, "I find books better but, what's _Good Will Hunting _about?"

"It's about a college janitor who has a genius IQ and then gets help regarding his talents from a therapist and professor. I just thought that since you're a genius and had to be discovered, that it was similar to the film. We _have _to watch that tonight by the way."

"Sounds great to me."

Their waitress approaches and Nyota knows at one glance that she's new. "Hello, I'm Crystal and I'll be your waitress for today. What can I get you?"

Jim orders a cheeseburger and milkshake which Nyota also takes. "That's strange…" Jim looks up at her, "what is?"

"You ordered what I always get." He raises his eyebrows in question. _"Really?"_ Uhura nods and places her hands on the tabletop, palms up. "Put your hands on mine, we're going to play a game."

Jim smiles eagerly, rubbing his hands together before placing them lightly on hers.

"I know this game; you're going to try to slap my hands, right?" Nyota nods again, "my dad would always play this game with me, his hands were legendarily fast."

Nyota drags her eyes up to his dangerously, "and so are mine."

Jim scoffs, "oh they can't be that fast," before he can finish his sentence Nyota has already laid a hard slap on both his hands. "Okay, that's fast. Try me again."

The grown adults play like children, switching roles until their food arrives.

They both finish their food and Jim orders another milkshake. When Crystal brings it with her usual southern smile, Nyota cocks an eyebrow. "Are we going to share that like in the movies?" Jim nods excitingly. "Yes, I've secretly always wanted to do this; and if you tell anyone I will deny it." Nyota laughs and puts her straw in next to his. "I might blab a little about what a hopeless romantic you are but only to Christine. Come on, let's do this." Jim smiles before taking the straw in his own mouth. They suck up the beverage together, Jim playfully making flirty eyes at Nyota until she finally giggles.

They finish and drive back to the lake just in time for the sunset. The two sit on the dock, hands entwined. Nyota sighs and scoots closer to her Captain, resting her head on his shoulder and closing her eyes at the warmth of his body.

Jim looks down at their hands when he feels her give a tight squeeze but when he looks back up at Nyota, she doesn't seem to realize she did it. Kirk shrugs it off and turns his head to watch the sun set the sky aflame in vibrant reds, oranges, and yellows.

"You've never seen an African sunset, have you?" Nyota whispers, bringing her face closer to his but still looking at the beautiful sight.

Jim shakes his head. "They're legendary…you never forget them."

"Why don't we take a picture?"

"Do you have a camera?" Jim pulls one out of his pocket in answer and quickly snaps a photo of the sunset before smiling at Nyota. "Let's do one together."

"Okay…"

The two pose together, Nyota resting her head on his shoulder and smiling softly. "I like it…I'm glad I came here with you."

"That's good. So do you watch any movies?"

Jim shrugs again, "I never have time, I'm the Captain of a Starship. I'm always doing Captain's logs and approving reports."

"Well you know most Captains just trust their crew and don't read every report word for word."

"Well I do."

"Why?"

"I don't know… It's not like I don't trust you guys to do your work thoroughly it's just I have to do it myself, I feel like it's my only job. How can you slack off on your only job?"

"I wouldn't know, Jimmy."

As soon as the nickname comes off her tongue, Jim stiffens beside her. Nyota immediately takes notice and looks up at him questioningly. "What's wrong?"

"Only my mother and George called me that."

"Who's George?"

"My dead brother."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know… I'll never say it again if you don't want me to."

Jim shakes his head to clear the flood of memories attacking him, "no its fine…just…no one has called me that in a long time."

"How'd he die?" Jim looks at Nyota with a hard stare and she realizes her mistake. "I'm sorry; you don't have to tell me."

"I've never told anyone who wasn't there."

The two enjoy the comforting silence for a few minutes as darkness consumes the light of day. The temperature drops and Nyota takes on a slight shiver.

Jim looks down at her in his arms. "Are you cold?"

"Yeah, just a little. It's usually warm at night…"

"Well it's about seven thirty; we should get home if you're going to show me that movie."

Nyota jumps up at that and beats him to the car, Jim laughing as he jogs after her.

Jim quickly drives them home, easily remembering the way. Kirk parks the dashing car in the large garage.

Nyota leads him to her bedroom and finds the old movie in her closet while Jim sits on the edge of her bed. She smiles to herself at how out of place he looks in the girly pink bedroom, sitting on the edge of her bed timidly.

"Oh come on, it's not like you've never been in a girl's bedroom before." Jim smiles up at her almost nervously before clearing his throat. "Yeah, well I've never been in your bedroom before." Jim mumbles under his breath, thinking Nyota doesn't hear but she does. Nyota smiles to herself again as she puts in the film before jumping onto the bed and climbing under the covers, patting the spot next to her. Kirk rolls his eyes and climbs up to lay down next to Nyota.

The two grow closer and closer throughout the movie, physically and emotionally. Only half way through the film Nyota is curled into Jim's warm side.

_Is it wrong I like having her in my arms?_ Jim thinks to himself, _well she did say that we were going to act like a couple for today…I would do this to a girlfriend of mine so I guess it's alright. Man, if Bones knew what I was doing right now he'd have my hide __**and **__my head. I really like her though…or do I just like her because she didn't want me back at the academy? I don't think so. I mean Nyota's smart, beautiful, and exotic, funny…she's perfect._

"Hey, are you paying attention?"

Jim nods yes hurriedly, "uh, yeah." Nyota's eyes turn to slits and she crosses her arms over her chest. "Then what just happened?"

"Will just broke up with Skylar." Nyota accepts it and asks, "What were you thinking about?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

"Us…right now…and what Bones would do to me if he found out."

"He wouldn't do anything." I look down at her.

"Not if I talked to him."

"That's true; you're the only woman who scares the bejesus out of him."

"Good."

Jim laughs at that and turns his attention back to the movie. About two hours later the two fall asleep with the credits rolling on the television. Nyota's head rests on Jim's clothed chest, his arms wrapped around her securely.

Jim's eyes snap open at the terrified screaming. Nyota fights to wake up, screaming at the brutality of her usual nightmare. Kirk flies into action and grabs his Lieutenant's shoulders, shaking her and calling her name.

"Nyota, Nyota, wake up! It's just a nightmare, wake up! Nyota!"

Uhura's horrified brown eyes look up at him but her pupils remain dilated and she continues to struggle against her Captain. The only place Jim can think to take her is her favorite room, so he does. Jim cradles his Lieutenant in his arms and quickly carries her to the glass room.

Kirk gently lays Nyota down on the glass tiles of the floor and shakes her awake again, this time softly calling her name.

Nyota's brown eyes lock on his and Jim sighs in relief at the calm he sees there.

"Jim."

Kirk's surprised at the effect his name has on him. Nyota says is it so softly and like it's a relief just to let it roll off her tongue. Jim's heart pulses a flash of warmth through his veins before he leans down and smashes his lips to Nyota's.

Jim straddles Nyota, sliding easily in between her legs. Jim licks her full lower lip in a silent ask of entrance which Nyota easily grants. Their tongues engage in a fierce battle with no clear winner as Nyota's hands come up to grip the cotton of Jim's shirt.

Jim moans at a wetness rubbing against the denim over his crotch. His hands rest on Nyota's warm thighs before slowing inching up until reaching her lace underwear. Two fingers latch into them, slowly pulling them down her legs just enough to expose her leaking heat.

Nyota gasps when she feels a hand down there. A skilled finger runs over her wet slit before slipping inside to circle her hole. Two more gasps escape Nyota; one at the thumb beginning to rub her clitoris softly and the second is harsher when two fingers slide into her.

Usually Jim would take more time with this but he doesn't really know what's going on. He's never been more aroused or eager to be inside someone and he doesn't know when this might be over.

Nyota runs her hands over Jim's warm torso underneath his shirt before they pull apart to slip it over his head. The two look at each other for a moment before continuing to undress each other. Jim tugs the sundress over Nyota's head before ridding her of her bra and underwear. Nyota pants in excitement as she takes off Jim's jeans.

They kick off their shoes and resume kissing passionately only to a slower tempo. Jim and Nyota are bathed in shimmering blue light.

Nyota breaks the kiss and rests her head on the floor with a moan at Jim's erection grazing over her slit. "You're good…" Jim smiles, she's right – he's using her juices to coat them both. "Thank you; I've had a lot of practice."

"Maybe you shouldn't have told me that last part."

"Right…are you sure about this?"

In answer, Nyota brings up her knees, parts her legs wider and applies gentle pressure against Jim's penis. Jim groans at the action before kissing her and slowly pushing in.

For the first time, Jim actually makes a sound when he's fully enveloped in her and not a small one. Jim cries out and looks down to see a smile on Nyota's face. "I've never done that before."

Nyota laughs softly, "Just move."

Jim eagerly obeys and begins with slow long thrusts into her tantalizing sex. He gradually picks up speed until each thrust earns a vocal response from both of them. Jim pulls out almost all the way and sinks back in completely to rotate his hips.

"_Ah…do it again…please." _Nyota's normally strong voice comes out as a weak and desperate whimper.

Jim finds a different angle and rotates his hips, making Nyota moan his name. _"Jim…oh god forgive me, this feels too good."_ Jim laughs and leans down to whisper into her ear, "this is a little too sinful."

"_Is it wrong that I believe you?"_

"Ha, not at all."

"I don't think I can last that long, I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. How long has it been?"

"Months."

Jim nods, the same goes for him and neither of them is on their A game. Jim thrusts grow slow again, deep, long, and making Nyota arch up to meet him halfway. "I'm gonna come."

"What, like _now, _or soon?"

"Like now…"

"Oh…" with a hard thrust, Nyota arches higher than ever and calls out Jim which leads him to his own end. Before Jim can pull out Nyota stops him and rolls them over.

"Round two already?"

Nyota nods while biting her lip before placing her hands firmly on his chest. She pulls herself up before quickly sliding back down his slightly flaccid member.

Jim quickly grows as hard as before as they make love again in the shimmering blue light. Kirk's eyes roll back and he lets Nyota take complete control of the sex all together. "Do you ever let other girls be in control like this?"

Jim nods a drowsy yes. "It turns you on doesn't it?"

Blue eyes pierce Nyota's brown ones. "Oh, yes…"

"Why?"

"I like to see a woman take control. That's why most of my fantasies about you are on the bridge." Nyota smiles at this new information and grinds down especially hard, making Jim groan.

"Do you ever wanna role play?"

Jim cocks an eyebrow out of curiosity. "Like what?"

"Let me be Captain…you know, dominant and submissive."

"So what I'm hearing is you wanna do this again."

Nyota smiles bravely while sliding back down. "Who could pass up James T. Kirk on a silver platter with an apple in his mouth?"

"Hhmm…kinky." Nyota laughs and picks up speed.

The only sounds filling the glowing glass room are slapping skin and moans of want. "Ah…not so hard…" Nyota ignores him and continues the same force. "Seriously, I'm not gonna last a second longer if you keep grinding down so hard."

Nyota leans forward to whisper in his red ear. "That's the plan." She sits back up to continue and Jim scowls at her. _"You_ are an evil woman."

"Go ahead; I want you to come first this time."

"Oh I will if you, _oh my god!"_ Jim cries when Nyota reaches a hand behind her and begins to roughly massage his testicles.

"You are _crazy!"_ Nyota smiles wickedly and shoves herself down before beginning to slide back and forth.

"Ok…that's it, I'm gonna, _ah!"_

Nyota arches her back and comes as her Captain's sperm swims into her. She collapses and smiles even when she's full and semen leaks out onto Jim's pelvis.

Nyota kisses her Captain's red lips lovingly before passing out.

Jim absently strokes her damp hair and whispers a quiet good night. James T. Kirk doesn't pray much but he does tonight, hoping she doesn't regret this tomorrow.

TBC


End file.
